On the Road with Billy Joel

A backpack, filled with a pair of jeans, an old t-shirt,

and a slurry of other random garments all tucked around

my ukulele, an archaic mechanism of sound with a single

disk present inside playing the sweetest soundtrack of an epic

existential crisis of a 20 something who will soon discover just how

little she really knows about anything, a musical journey from Georgia

to Kansas to Vienna to help propel my movement from Vegas to

Anchorage, three books, two poetry, EAP to dwell in my past

and Emerson to help me “be with” my journey and embrace my future,

one solid novel in hand, one to guide me on why I am on this

journey but surely not to guide me on how, my journey will not end with

me eating the wrong berries, in hindsight perhaps an Eddie Vedder CD

would have been great a juxtaposition for this trip,

my phone, notably absent, an unwelcome character in my heroic tale

of concurring my dependence and pulling my sword of self-identity

from the confines of the romanticized ideal of youthful over-exertion,

a notebook, not large or flashy, no cheesy sentiment of day seizing or

self love plastered on the front, I don’t need the reminder, this

is why I’m here, going there, possibly nowhere at all.

This is my journey.

Its only a dream, a plan, an escape from the dull dread of monotony and

stagnation. Someday I will find my Alaska where Vienna will surely be waiting.


Broken Pathways 

Two eyes like Phobos and Deimos, my mind their mother Mars.
The endlessness bounding onward beyond andromeda stars.
A galaxy all of my own, confined to the midnight hours.
Awake deconstructing thoughts, collapsing ivory towers.
A land thought to be baron, a civilization hiding in fear.
A planet of things left unfinished, a wasteland of broken gears.
I found an old rocket ship, but all its parts were out of place.
Hopeful to escape the lonesome nights, leaving but a trace.
The glow from distant stars, showed the twinkle of a key.
As I started to brush away the sand it grew into a tree.
I climbed through broken branches moving with all my might.
When I reach the top I was greeted by a tiny orb of light.
I grabbed it in my hands and placed it in a jar.
Unsure of its purpose or mine, but it’s the best I have so far.
I took it to the old rocket ship and set it free into the air.
It whizzed around the engine leaving nothing but a flare.
The engines been ignited, so I climbed my way inside.
Flying to me is foreign, but at least I can say I tried.
It started off the ground, blowing debris and a mass of sand.
I wish I knew which way to go so maybe I’d understand,
Which path will finally take me where I wish to go,
Or which path will make me stagnant or which will help me grow.
Perhaps I’ll let the universe decide the final fate I seek.
Perhaps the decision was never mine, accepting sweet defeat.
I fly into the distance, with an end nowhere in sight.I let the universe guide my hands. I’ll just enjoy the flight. 

Marble Monuments

We spend all our lives,

stacking dominoes.

We stack until monuments

of marble tower before us.

We stack on for miles

and miles, rows of dominoes

disappearing along the horizon.

When we stacked as many as we could,

We’d sit and marvel at its majestic glow,

building momentum to keep going.


Until someone comes along and rattles the earth

beneath us. We watch as the first domino begins to

fall. We run along them desperate to hold them

We’re helpless. We’re left to watch as

everything we’ve worked so hard for

crashes to the sand, and when it

is done, we’re left to stand

in the middle of our

shattered empire

to salvage what

is left behind

and start


The Bird, the Fall, and the Cage

Little bird, so small and free,

Safe and warm up in its tree.

How it dreams to one day fly

And simply kiss the world goodbye.

Nurtured, loved, and never bruised.

Unknowing of the life it’d lose.

The love of spring still was ripe,

And hid away the dark, cold night.

But fall soon came,

And as birds know,

When the leaves change,

Fear starts to grow.

So all the birds stayed

Up high in their nests.

To flee for their lives,

For that’s all they had left.

One chirp or one move,

One wing out of line,

Could mean a swift end

Their ending of time.

The fear was too much

For a small bird to bear.

And the pain and the hurt

Left a young bird so scared,

For the day growing near

Where the nest won’t be safe

And the bird and its family

Will be taken away.

Fate was not kind,

Hate dimmed all the light

And filled the small bird,

With one single night.

From the hand of the hunter,

To the sinister cage.

The bird’s all alone

That cannot be changed.

The end came too quick.

It was too late to save.

The dark walls of the cage,

Became the walls of its grave.

The Sheep

Goodnight poor restless morning, still haunting in your mind.
If only you could get to sleep, I know that you could find
The words to put on paper, the words that make you see
The sounds of terror in your mind, have always come from me.
The dark and distant chatter, the sounds of running feet,
The sounds of rustling up above, the feeling of defeat.
I know you hear me taunting. I know you hear me scream,
And I know deep down inside you’ve always known it’s me.
Sometimes I think you hate me, sometimes I’m what you need.
You’re in denial if you think you’ll make it without me.
I’m the one who’s loved you, the one who’s kept you safe,
The one who pushed all the people that you loved away.
I know you think you need them, but all you need is sleep.
Now rest dear child, for in the morning all you’ll have is me.
Good morning – well, bad morning, I should really say.
I bet a deep, dejected nap, would make it all okay.
You’re not strong enough to face it, trust me you’d agree.
We both know that to strive for life, is just a desperate plea.
You’re useless and you know it, you’re simply far too weak.
You sound pathetic crying there. You shouldn’t even speak.
Trust me they can’t help you. They don’t understand.
They are only nice to you because you’re never sad.
They wouldn’t like the real you. Don’t be so naïve.
You don’t even like you, that’s why we must deceive.
Now keep your secrets hidden – between just you and me
It’s better to be hurt inside than show that your in need.
You know the way to oust me, but you’re just too weak.
For now a quiet mind requires just a bit of sleep.
Hello my darling child, now you see me in your dreams.
I’m growing stronger every day at your disesteem.
I hear you when you cry at night, cry yourself to sleep,
I feel your angst, disquiet now, spirit almost freed.
Giving up is easy now. Now that you believe
That everything worth fighting for you cannot achieve.
Don’t waste these moments with goodbye –
Don’t waste them without me.
Don’t waste them trying to justify,
Just spend them here with me.
Now close your eyes my child
And watch the pretty sheep.
Fall asleep forever now –
What a sweet relief.



Focus frantic, for future depends

Focus now or meet your end.

Finally, the finale’s forging,

Foraging a fox eyed friend.

You’re gone forever,

Sacrificed to the franchise.

Forced to face an unfair end.


Of flighty foresight, and

Of defiled, fragmented

Formality of family.

Olfactory sensations of

Pheromones flying freely.

Yet forbade from functioning,

In the fitly fashion,

Of the humans before us.

Fight the machine

Fight the franchise

Fight the frenzied fight

Toward final conformity.


I will not fall faintly,

Do not fall too

Frightened to stop falling

For familiar is a comfort

To the faint of heart.

Fight familiarity,

Abandon comfort